beccarivers
Sentimentality Is Killing Me
Sentimentality is killing me.
It’s the whimsy piano theme that plays while children skip through sun-dappled fields in neutral tones. Little bows bounce on the ends of braids, and little grubby palms cup a frog....
Parenting: Like Learning To Ride A Bike
My four-year-old learned to ride her bike recently. At first, it was just her and me during the day. She woke up ready to ride, and her six-month-old sister was happy to oblige from...
Post Holiday Me: Unplugged
I sat down to write, and all my brain could muster was, "what could you even write about?" I could write about how the holidays are over and, thanks to antidepressants, this has been...
Preschool Scaries
At a family reunion this summer, my cousin, whom I hadn't seen in ten years, asked if my daughter was in preschool. And she then was positively dismayed when I said she wasn't. She...
Bans Off Our Bodies
The older I get, the more I become aware of this war on women. It's quiet, demure– the way I've always been told I should be. I recently told my three-year-old daughter about "tricky...
An Ode To The Things That Keep Me Up At Night
Oh husband’s breath, that does keep me awakeDoth snort and rattle and grumble and quakeA pillow to whack, but stop short insteadQuick google search– ‘how much for two twin beds?’My Googling fingers dance to...
Life Comes at You Fast
Three days ago, at four am I sent my husband a two-page google doc simply titled, “I’m angry.” So yeah, I’d say I’ve rounded the proverbial bend. I told him that I could not...
Do People Still Say ‘In Your Feelings’ ?
I’ve been prone to depressive episodes for as long as I can remember. As a kid, graduating to the next level of swim lessons, family visits ending, being gifted my first bra from my...
Our Journey: We Are Pregnant
My husband wanted to announce our pregnancy at 12 weeks on social media. I was 12 weeks pregnant on Father’s Day, and he had had such little control in any of this. We had...
Where Does the Time Go?
One of the things that drive me crazy, and ask my husband—there are MANY, is when people shake their head and sigh, “where does the time go?” Most of the time, they are staring...
Randy’s Story: Our Youth and Gun Violence
Let me tell you about Randy. If you met him when I did, you would see a seventh-grader with a strong sense of self. The thing about middle schoolers is that they so rarely...
The Science of Being Barefoot Despite Fall Nipping at My Toes
You can’t deny the fading of the summer sun. Whether it's Starbucks pumpkin spice tickling your nostrils or perhaps Target’s dollar spot fall décor calling your name, it’s no secret that autumn is catching...
Blame It on the Quarantine
Disclaimer: What follows here might sound absolutely absurd. But here’s the deal—I love Jesus. I have not, and I am not always great at showing that. I am much better at remembering prayers of...
Dear Daughter
My Dear Lottie Grace,
I drove home from the gym yesterday in the early dark hours. I was feeling strong and confident, and I suddenly felt an urge to tell you that as a girl...