Hi, my name is Chandler, and I am an introvert. What is an introvert? Merriam-Webster defines an introvert as someone who is reserved and quiet and leans into introspection, and enjoys their own company. I’ve never felt so seen. I’ve spent most of my life thinking there was something wrong with me. I should be more talkative. I should not be so quiet. I should be more outgoing. Well, it took a while, well into my 30s, but I’m letting go of what I think I should be and embracing who and what I am.
Motherhood can have its own set of unique struggles. Being introverted has its own set of unique struggles. Living in a house full of extroverts presents its own set of unique struggles. Both my kids (and my husband) are talkers. I have offered my kids money if they could keep silent for 10 minutes. Neither of them has ever won the bet. While I love my extroverted family, they can tire me. Over the years, I have learned a few tips to help me manage. Here are a few of my favorites.
Leave the room
I have had times where I felt like a bad mom because I needed a few minutes to gather myself. I have learned that it’s okay to be honest. I have had to tell them to give me a few minutes because I need some time to myself. And they were fine with it. There were no hard feelings, and they all still love me.
Knowing my limits
My son plays sports. All the lights and people can exhaust me. Kid’s birthday parties are definitely exhausting. I know that if I’m going to have a busy weekend, to take some time out for myself or even saying no I can’t do something. Overextending my mental limits never ends well.
Find quiet activities
I love being a mom and doing activities with my kids. But I like my quiet too. Kids and quiet do not always go hand in hand. Baking, arts and crafts, and reading together are some of my favorite kid-friendly, quiet activities.
To all my introverted mamas, there is nothing wrong with you. You do not need to make yourself into an extroverted, outgoing person. I am pretty sure I’ve googled “how to be outgoing.” I found that when I tried to pretend to be someone I wasn’t, what resulted was an uncomfortable, inauthentic mess. I’ve learned to embrace my introversion, and my hope for my other introverted mamas is that you learn to embrace it, too.
