About six months ago, a good friend left me a voice memo. I didn’t even know what it was when it popped up in my texts, but when I opened it, my friend’s voice rang through, sharing a story she thought I would appreciate. I don’t recall the specific details, but I responded, and we began a lengthy conversation. Since then, we have shared hundreds of messages ranging from what we’re making for dinner and what crazy outfits our kids picked out for the day to podcasts that made us think and deeply personal challenges we’re navigating. It has given me a glimpse into my friend’s life that feels reminiscent of my friendships before kids, and I’m loving it.
I’ve always preferred to live life with friends. As an extrovert, I never cared much for being alone. In high school, I chatted with my best friend every day after school (on our parents’ home phones, of course). I lived in a sorority during college and with roommates after college. I loved running errands together, debriefing our days, and letting each other’s dogs out, among other things. I’m fortunate to have meaningful friendships as a mom, and we enjoy going out for the occasional dinner together. Still, we’re rarely chatting daily, especially about the ordinary things that comprise most of our lives. This is, of course, a natural shift, but I miss the intimacy in friendship that comes from sharing in the mundane moments. As someone who doesn’t enjoy lengthy text conversations and can’t always guarantee an hour of uninterrupted time for a phone call, the voice memo has given me a taste of the good old days, when I lived life alongside my friends. I love feeling a part of their days, knowing where they’re stuck in traffic, hearing their conversations with their kids, and how long it’s taking for their Target pick-up to be ready.
I messaged a different friend the other day, and she responded with a point I had never considered. She said, “Thanks so much for the compliment. Normally, when someone says kind things to me in person, I get uncomfortable and don’t know how to respond, but the audio message just allowed me to bask in it for a minute!” This felt relatable and made me want to reach out to all my friends immediately. The voice memo offers a great alternative to texting, allowing you to hear the intended tone of the message being communicated.
Technology can certainly have its downsides; as moms, we’re intimately familiar with the guilt that accrues from utilizing screens. But the benefits certainly exist as well, and for me, the voice memo has been a surprising and overly positive one. In a world where it’s easy to become isolated, I’m looking for any way to connect with my friends, to hear about their successes and struggles, what they’re finding interesting, and how they’re navigating motherhood in their own unique corners of the world. If you haven’t tried it before, I highly recommend voice-memoing a friend. Whether you’re messaging about logistics of pick-up times, just to say hi, or to share something you appreciate about them, I can almost guarantee that hearing your voice will make their day.
