As crazy as this may sound to some people, my child is a furry. The reason I decided to write about this is that, since my child became involved in the furry fandom, we have received a wide range of reactions, from excited to disgusted, and from complimentary to rude and misinformed. I am not sure if it’s because I am naive, or perhaps a pretty nonjudgmental person, but the extreme disgust towards an 11-year-old child’s desire to create an animal character and animal masks really surprised me! Why are people so opposed to a hobby that produces absolutely no harm to anyone?
I have chosen to write this blog anonymously due to the extreme reactions it has elicited. Children in the furry fandom are twice as likely to be bullied as non-furry children, and therefore, I decided not to identify myself or my child. We have also chosen as a family to keep this a secret between ourselves, while wholeheartedly supporting our child.
So, what is a furry? According to Dr. Sharon Roberts, who has studied the furry fandom for over 15 years, furries are: “a group of people who formed a community, or fandom, because they have a common interest in anthropomorphic media, friendships and social inclusion”.
Let’s go back to the beginning… A few years ago, my child began to discover the furry fandom online. They started by creating masks, from scratch, using online tutorials. As a mom who appreciates any offline hobby, I supported their choice to go to Michaels and buy everything needed including animal mask templates, mesh, acrylic paint, a hot glue gun, glue, fur and other felt materials. I assumed my child would make a terrible mess, get bored, and that would be the end of that! I cannot express my delight when they finished their first mask! It was so well done, with a great deal of effort and time invested in creating this masterpiece. Since then, they have made many masks including sculpting new noses and snouts using old boxes, and even using a dinosaur head to create an entirely mythical creature with large ears.
So, what is the problem with furries? To begin with, I knew absolutely nothing about the furry fandom and could not understand how people could be rude to my child. A woman in her 40s openly called my child ‘weird’ in front of her toddler, who took a liking to my child’s fake tail. I’ve also had parents tell their children they are no longer allowed to play with my child. So the backlash is real!
Through research and speaking to other parents, I have discovered myths that hang heavily over the furry community. I will go through each one to discuss what is fact and what is fiction.
Furries use litter boxes and are demanding that litter boxes be placed in schools
I have heard this many times, but I have yet to find a real-life example of this happening. I have spoken to teachers who have also debunked this. There may be one example somewhere, but I have yet to find it. The other side of this is that most ‘fursonas’ are mythical creatures, such as unicorns, or they are a combination of animals, such as a fox crossed with a dinosaur, and these are not creatures that use litter boxes. I also have not met any furries who have used a litter box.
Furries bark rather than talk.
Again, going back to my previous point, although some furries are based on dogs, the majority I have encountered are mythical creatures. Also, most furries I have met, adults included, are typically mute when they have their fursuits or fur masks on. I have yet to encounter a furry who barks rather than talks. Many furries use the fandom as their social circle, and talking is an integral part of communicating with new friends.
Acting like an Animal in School
I have yet to encounter any teacher who has experienced any child refusing to work as they would rather act like an animal. The myths surrounding furries appear to mainly discuss how children are disrupting the class, and I have not found one example of this. I am in no way saying it has not happened; however, I am generally saying it does not.
Adult Fandom
There is a side to the furry fandom that allows for adults to meet and cosplay. Personally, what people do in a consensual setting is absolutely none of my business. However, this is explicitly for consenting adults and does not involve children. As parents, we do our best to ensure our child is safe at all times, online and offline, as we all should.
Furries is a fandom, similar to cosplay, Star Trek, or even football. The members wear fursuits similar to dressing up for a Star Trek convention or wearing a jersey to a football match. My child has expressed a love for creating and making and has found a loving and supportive community. Being a furry and being part of the furry fandom has significantly increased my child’s confidence. They have adapted and improved their mask-making skills and have created a fabulous and diverse group of friends. We recently attended Indy Fur Con and loved how diverse and accepting the group was. Approximately 5-17% of the furry fandom are neurodiverse, and up to 70% are LGBTQ+. We noticed people from all walks of life, across all economic barriers, and with varying abilities and disabilities. The furry fandom has created a safe space where people can be their true, authentic selves. Why would I stop my child from associating with a group that has supported them and enriched their lives?
