Back to school is in full swing, and I realized our summer was amazing, and then it was gone. Please don’t get me wrong; it is nice to get a break from the endless snacking and question asking. They enjoyed camping and left this summer feeling a lot more ready to conquer a new school year. Per usual, we scheduled wellness appointments for the kids. My daughter was first, and she is entering the fourth grade, and there have been changes, her temperament was shorter, more attitude, less patience and of course bodily changes that were subtle until they were not. Asking me questions about body changes and everything that comes with maturing. I thought I was prepared because I am confident, and that would come through when I taught my children about bodily changes. I wanted her to be prepared to conquer the changes instead of fearing them.
In her wellness appointment, her pediatrician mentioned the discussion of puberty, and all my plans went out of the window. I lost my confidence and became sad because I couldn’t help but wonder, Where did my baby go? I begged myself to pull it together, this was not the moment to fall apart, she had questions, and I had answers, until I did not. Suddenly, I felt nervous and unprepared, and in that moment, I recalled when she was a baby. However, my daughter was ready to approach this. She was fully aware of how to approach all the things that were happening to her. She mentioned that her moods and friendships were changing, which made me feel for her, as the coming years would be filled with so many confusing changes. Her pediatrician continued asking her if she knew what to do if she started her period and the importance of having a little makeup bag full of essentials. I sat in my seat, realizing that all of this was jarring for me, but I must get my head in the game so that I could be fully present for her. As she answered all her pediatrician’s questions, I felt proud that even if just in conversation, I had prepared for what was to come. With our pediatrician, we created a list of strategies to help your daughter cope with the anxiety of change in a meaningful way.
- Pack a “makeup bag” full of essentials, including sanitary napkins and wipes, a small comb, their favorite body spray, and their favorite lip gloss.
- Take two showers a day, especially if you participate in sports. It helps you relax, and as your body changes, it brings different odors, so you want to stay ahead of the game.
- Do not be afraid to talk. Having conversations with your child about puberty is essential to taking the fear away. The more they know, the less shocked they will be when changes happen.
- Pace yourself (parents)-These changes have been occurring for years; however, this is new for you. Have patience with yourself and your child because you are both navigating uncharted territory.
Every school year brings about change, especially as our children get older. I have never felt so vulnerable because every year it brings a different challenge, and even though I am having a tough time, the kids are crushing it, and I could not be prouder.
