I Miss My Girlfriends


My husband is amazing. He does most of the cooking and grocery shopping for our household, cleans up the house most evenings after we’re both exhausted, and is an equal partner in raising our daughter. I could go on and on, but this post isn’t about him. This post is about the fact that, despite feeling incredibly lucky to be married to a fantastic man, what I need most right now is time with my friends–or specifically my girlfriends. I miss my girlfriends.

I have girlfriends that I’ve known since elementary school, ones that I met in college, and some who I’ve known for only a couple of years. Since the pandemic started, I rarely see any of them. When it was warmer out, I would go over to a good friend’s house for “driveway drinks.” We would catch up on each other’s lives with our beverage of choice while we sat in the driveway. That was as close to normal as things got for me during the first spring of the pandemic. During the later summer months when COVID felt more controlled, I ventured to a few restaurants with outdoor seating to meet a friend for dinner. With winter temperatures these past few months, visiting outside has become nearly impossible. I miss my girlfriends.

The importance of girlfriends is not a new topic. Healthline and Psychology Today both recognize how critical female friendships are. Indianapolis Moms even discussed the importance of girlfriends a few years ago. Nope, this topic isn’t new, but it’s one that weighs more heavily on my mind now.

I’ve done what most of us have done to try and fill the girlfriends’ void: use Zoom, Facetime, texting, and calling to make up for the lack of physical presence, but it’s just not the same. What I need is in-person time with them. I want to be in the same room and talk aimlessly for hours. Laugh at random inside jokes. Vent about husbands or kids and feel like I’m completely understood, totally normal, and not alone. I want to hug my girlfriends and go grab Mexican food together and not worry about getting sick or getting someone else sick because of the virus. I want a girlfriend’s night away to temporarily shrug off the cares of the world and focus only on our friendships. I miss my girlfriends.

I fully acknowledge that I am lucky. I have my health, a roof over my head, and a family who loves and supports me. Even with all of this, I still feel an ache in my soul that can only be filled by the girlfriends who know me so intimately. These girlfriends allow me to just be and who view me as a friend they love and not as the wife/mother/teacher that I am in the other parts of my life. I will continue to feel gratitude for the time I have with my husband and daughter, but, wow, I miss my girlfriends. Anyone else feeling this way?