You are an amazing Father.
Your children know you are. They hang all over you the second the get to walk through the door of their home to see your smile. They blow raspberries…aka arm farts…on you instead of a hug or a kiss, but they do so as they are already jumping into your arms. You feel more loved in that moment than anything else. In that moment, zero time has passed and you simply pick up where you left off. It’s magic.
You fight for your children without apology. You fight everyday for their right to have you as their dad. You fight every day for their safety, even though you can’t see them every moment. You fight for their right to live in 2 homes that show them equal love, care, concern, happiness, time, effort…you name it. You fight for it. You don’t give up.
You are kind to the others in their life. You are not selfish. You will always want what is best for your children. You work hard to do so.
You stayed up late for feedings, diaper changes, rocking back to sleep. You had monumental amounts of spit up down your back and blow outs of epic proportions. You did it all. When you look back on all of it, you laugh and smile. You know every gross disaster was worth the time together.
You have dealt with emergency room visits and terrifying ordeals with your children. Middle of the night phone calls with an illness and you never hesitated to be at the hospital….even if it meant you had to travel 7,000 miles. You would go further than that if you had to. You would also do it again in a heartbeat. There is no distance too far between you and your child.
You may have found someone else who loves your children the way you do. Hang onto them. They can create a love that is beyond what you could’ve ever imagined. It is what you wanted for the idea of your family. Family isn’t built by birth alone. It is built by the positive relationships that enhance one’s own self worth and well being. It is how we come together that creates the unity that determines what a ‘family’ is. Do not underestimate what a partner can bring to your life as well as your children. Feel blessed for what you have instead of what could’ve been.
If you choose (or have) to do this alone, do it. Be Superman. You already are.
Never doubt yourself. You are Dad. You are an equal part of their life. You will always be “Daddy”. You may only get every other weekend, certain holidays, summers… but you are influential 365 days. You are the sun in your children’s lives. Their world will always revolve around you. Their world wouldn’t revolve without you in it.
Keep doing the best you can and they will appreciate everything in the end.