This is my third pregnancy and if there is anything I’ve learned so far is that I despise being the pregnant friend. During my first pregnancy, I honestly didn’t have a lot of friends to hang out with, so it wasn’t an issue. With my second, I was so busy with my other baby that the time flew by and then Covid happened. Now with my third, I’ve traveled across the country, been in a wedding, and constantly driving my girls everywhere. To say I’m exhausted is an understatement but I’m nonetheless blessed to be on this motherhood journey. However, being the only pregnant one through this season of motherhood has been challenging. Here are four reasons why being the pregnant friend isn’t the bee’s knees (at least to me!)
I am a walking Debbie Downer.
When you’re pregnant, you have to restrict yourself to certain foods and activities. You can’t necessarily have sushi with friends or go skydiving. Ok, sky diving might be a reach but it’s the fact that being pregnant makes it hard to participate in anything exciting such as winery tours, bachelorette parties, or simply just going out to dinner with friends. I hate to say pregnancy limits me from doing fun activities with friends but also I have to be my own advocate. I want to be able to enjoy myself and I know it’s not my season right now, but I don’t like missing out on fun memories.
I am the designated driver.
It’s not a big deal but in some ways, it is because I feel like that’s the only reason I get invited out. On one hand, I get to dress up and have some fun but also it’s not THAT fun sipping on lemon water and watching everyone else have a good time while I have to visit the bathroom every hour.
I am living in an exhausted and nauseous state 24/7.
Morning sickness for me didn’t stay in the morning OR in the first trimester. I’m well into my third trimester and I still get random bouts of nausea and heartburn. Exhaustion is my middle name so I hate to turn down invites with friends but also, I wouldn’t be someone fun to be around when all I want to do is relax. I’d rather lay on my couch and catch up on my shows.
Lastly, everything hurts.
Maybe it’s my third pregnancy or maybe I’m older, or maybe it’s a combination of the two but literally, my whole body hurts. While my friends can simply sit in a chair or walk to the other side of the room, I’m constantly wiggling or walking at a snail’s pace because this bowling bowl of a belly is heavy and wreaking havoc on my ligaments and muscles. You know the saying “you’re only as strong as your weakest player?” Well, I don’t like being the weakest one in the group and I hate to be the person to bring other people down because my body simply cannot keep up. (Refer back to #1.)
I know I’m not the only one who is exhausted throughout the nine months of pregnancy. You are definitely not alone. I never had a “glow” of pregnancy and had terrible morning sickness with all of my pregnancies. Do not mistake this as a complaint about being pregnant because, in the grand scheme of things, I do love being pregnant. I just don’t like being “the pregnant one” in my group of friends.