I’m so, so thrilled to be expecting my second child, due in mid-June. So far, the biggest surprise of this pregnancy is how much more difficult it has been than my pregnancy with my son, now just over two-years-old. Now, please don’t get me wrong. I know some women have pregnancies filled with complications or worse. I know many women struggle to become pregnant and stay pregnant, so I don’t want to complain; I am incredibly fortunate. Still, parenting while pregnant is challenging: more so than I expected. Here are some of the things I’m feeling, and perhaps I’m not alone.
– More exhausted than ever: I was very tired with my son’s pregnancy, but it was mostly just sleepiness. Now, my exhaustion is all-encompassing. It is not just related to sleep; I’m physically exhausted, too. Playing and chasing (and consoling and carrying) a toddler is tough, even when I wasn’t pregnant. Now in the second trimester, some of my energy is back, but the mom and mama-to-be job is still even harder.
– More intense symptoms: During a recent doctor’s appointment, I described my pregnancy symptoms. I told my doctor I was having all the same symptoms as I did with Deacon, but they were occurring earlier and more intensely than before. She said, “yes, everything is ‘more’ and ‘early’ after your first child.” Indeed, doc. Indeed.
– More tears: I cried a bit during my pregnancy with Deacon. But, this pregnancy it is much more. My husband actually has had a running count of days in a row when I didn’t cry. We’ve reached double-digits a few times, but it is so inconsistent. Not only are hormones making me emotional, but I’m also tearing up at more of my son’s milestones. He called another toddler a “friend” = tears. He hug tackled me after a day I spent away from him = tears. Watching him grow is even more emotional because I’m pregnant.
I am tired often, my back hurts despite the fact my stomach isn’t that big yet, and I am tearing up regularly, but I’m so happy. It’s a wonderful feeling to know a second child is coming, but it is also emotional to know that Deacon’s only child days are coming to an end. I struggle with anticipating the division of my love when the second arrives. However, I’m trying not to look at it like that. While my time will be divided, my love won’t. And while the trials of parenting while pregnant may be cumbersome, in the end, every moment and challenge will be worth it one hundred times over, for every member of our family.
