I Don’t Want to Adult Anymore

Adulting, zero out of five stars, do not recommend. I’ve decided at the ripe age of 38 that I tried this adulting thing, it’s just like really hard, and I don’t want to do it anymore. I am coming out to the world and declaring that I no longer want to adult. 

It’s just too much. All day, every day, I have to adult. From the moment my kids wake me up, demanding I immediately adult while also parenting (how dare they). Then hardcore corporate America is adulting, with so many spreadsheets and emails. Emails where I pretend to be a very professional adult with replies like, “I apologize for the delay, but I’ve attached the requested report.” When all I really want to say is, “Oh, go kick rocks, Karen, and figure out how to use technology like the rest of us!” Then, on to the nighttime routine where, yet again, I, the adult, am responsible for feeding the tiny humans living in my house and for everything between dinner and bedtime. 

Then don’t forget the bills, the appointments, coordinating activities, scheduling your summer out in January because you have to make sure you get a spot at zoo camp, grocery shopping, dishes, laundry, more laundry because it never ends, cleaning, somewhere in there taking something that resembles a shower, so many decisions, then don’t forget about taxes. Time for myself? That’s not happening in adult world.

It’s just too much, and if I’m being honest, lately, being a responsible adult has felt really hopeless. Maybe it’s the seasonal depression that gets to all of us in the Midwest this time of year but dang, I just want to curl up in a ball with my blankie and shut the world out.

What really did me in were these last several years. We adults have had to do a lot of extra adulting since 2020, and I’m tapped out. 

I just want to time-travel back to the magical world before it got to be too much. A world where the only responsibility I had was keeping my Tamagotchi alive. A world where the highlight of my day was the countdown on TRL. Give me a dELiA*s catalog, the TGIF lineup on a Friday night, JTT posters, and my jelly sandals. That is where I want to be. That magical world before all of the chaos and noise.

What if we could find some of that magic now as adults? The magic of not taking life so seriously, of not constantly worrying about the outcomes, and of not trying to keep it all together. What if we just let go? Let go of what it should be, let go of the plans, and let go of the constant to-do list in our brains. Stay more present, and as cliche as it sounds, enjoy the little things. 

What if we could also redefine what “adulting” means? One thing adulting has taught me is that this life, being an “adult,” can look however we want it to. I prefer this life to be less about paying bills and laundry and more about the magical moments of sunshine and living room dance parties. I prefer my adulting to be less about scheduling and planning and more about spontaneous fun.  

Here’s to all of us adults finding more of that magic daily.