It’s a question that comes up often while making small talk with friends and family I haven’t seen in a while. “Do you still write?” I have been writing for as long as I can remember — middle school writing contests, college newspaper, a personal blog, and in most recent years, freelance opportunities. I wish I could answer that question thoroughly, jumping into what I’ve been working on, but pursuing my passions after becoming a mom hasn’t been easy. I haven’t been writing much at all. I know it’s ironic to be talking about “not writing” in a blog post that I am, in fact, writing, but here we are.
At the beginning of my motherhood journey, I wanted to document everything. I wrote monthly milestone updates on social media and dedicated a blog post to my baby whenever I had the chance. I picked up paid writing opportunities when I could. I was trying to find my place in the “mommy blogger” space. As a full-time editor working in a cubicle turned stay-at-home mom/part-time freelancer, I had more time on my hands. My baby slept a lot, I was a little lonely, and writing was a good outlet.
Now, I have three kids, two of which are no longer napping, and my free time is limited. As my kids get older, I’m finding that I don’t have the creativity or the bandwidth to sit down and pour my heart onto a page. My brain space is taken up with too many birthday party invites, dentist appointments, and the never-ending grocery list. I miss the girl who would open up her Notes app and start writing freely as soon as a thought came to me, but at this moment in time, the first three things in said app are “turkey, cheese, and honey mustard” — a request from my daughter when we didn’t have what she wanted for lunch.
We’ve all heard the phrase, “Don’t lose yourself in motherhood,” but raising three small kids who need me 24/7 seems like a good reason to do so. So, writing gets put on the back burner. Maybe for another mom, it’s painting, sewing, or singing. I’m in awe of moms who can keep up with their hobbies and side gigs in this season of life, but I find it challenging.
I know this is just a season. I assume that at some point, I will have the time and the bandwidth to pursue my passions or maybe even find a new one. There’s nothing like motherhood to remind you how quickly time goes. No season lasts forever.
