I consider myself a hugger, but I am not always surrounded by fellow huggers. I love hugs! Olaf and I are kindred spirits that way. The small kindness of a hug can show affection, comfort a tender heart and rejuvenate a soul. A hug to a fellow mom is a silent message that tells them, “I understand, I am here for you.”
As my son grows, I am sure he is going to dislike all the affection his hugging mama bestows on him, but for now, I will shower him with all the hugs I can give him. My hope is that he grows up to be a hugger and finds value in their power.
My husband is a non-hugger and that is okay most of the time, but I do not realize when I need a hug from another adult until it is too late. I have a hard time letting him know when I need a hug. As a non-hugger, I am sure it is hard for him to identify when I do need one. The hugs I do receive are empowering to me. They are silent messages of affection that are comforting and invigorating.
Hugs were a staple in my teenage and early twenties. They were sparse in my thirties and in my forties I realize how important (and vital) they are to me. The act of hugging has a direct correlation to what was going on in my life. Teenage/Twenties were years I was looking for validation of my affections. In my thirties, I felt more secure in who I was and focused on my life path. My forties, I find myself a new(er) mom, something that most find themselves in during their twenties and thirties and I need hugs for a different validation and comfort. Hugs rejuvenate me and give me a connection to the person I choose to bestow my gift, but they are also consoling and affirming.
Recently, I attended a Meet and Greet with a moms group I joined. It was held in the home of a Mentor Mama and when I walked over the threshold, I was instantly enveloped in a warm embrace. I did not realize how much I needed that hug until I was hugged by this woman (thanks Becky) in greeting. I felt then I was among my people and with the women I needed to be connecting. That wonderful embrace fueled me for days, but it also got me thinking about the power of a hug.
Several days later I ran into a close friend I had not seen in a while. My embrace with her, in the dairy aisle at the grocery store, was the icing to my week. I think divine intervention made that hug possible. She was in my path at a time I needed mommy assurance, an old friend and adult conversation.
As mothers, we are generally the caregivers to our families and friends. The motherly instinct has always been my trade mark in personal relationships and job roles. I am drawn to those people and positions who need an excellent side kick to take care of them, but I digress. . .
I was saying; mothers generally are taking time to make sure everyone is taken care of and we do forget to recharge and take care of ourselves. Hugs for me are a simple act of recharging my soul. Hugs say, I am loved, I am needed and I am thankful for you.
The holidays are coming! During this time of parties and general hustle and bustle of activities, remember to take time for you. Hug a friend, your partner or a fellow mama and let them know they are loved and cherished. A hug is a perfect gift and a way to recharge your soul. Hugs are also a hell of a lot cheaper than a massage, but if you can go for the massage, go for the massage, always go for the massage!
