In the winter of 2020, I was 30+ weeks pregnant with my third baby. I was anxiously awaiting a bad flu season to end and warmer temperatures to begin. And then the pandemic hit. In my isolation and consumption of too much bad news, I suddenly felt paralyzed. Self-care was a distant memory. I was glued to my phone while my kids watched movies in the background, and it felt like time stood still. Four years later, I woke up after election day having similar, spiraling thoughts. But this time, I can’t let myself feel paralyzed.
Since the beginning of time, people have faced difficult things. The difference is that we now have social media to remind us of every difficult thing happening to every person, every second of every day. Whether you’re feeling emotional or doing okay, we live in divisive times filled with too much information, and we could all use a little more self-care.
In times when I feel uncertain, I’m going to focus on the things that I can control.
Getting outside every day.
I feel better when I’m in nature. As the days get darker and colder, I will still try to get outside every day for a walk, bike ride, or to watch my kids play.
Leaning into cozy things.
As moms, we’re constantly making sure our kids are comfy, and we deserve to feel that way too. For me, this means doing things like keeping my kitchen stocked with my favorite brand of coffee and tea and buying a new robe and slippers. I like to warm up my side of the bed with a heating pad before I get into it at night, and I always have a good playlist on my phone so I can listen when I’m driving or doing things around the house. All little things, but very comforting.
Volunteering at my kids’ school.
When I feel lost or out of control, the best thing I can do for myself is to get out of the house and get involved locally. Teachers need help, and going into the workroom to make copies or helping to plan a class party keeps me involved and makes me feel useful.
Reading a book.
I purposely choose light and mindless books so I can get lost in a story without the temptation to scroll my phone. If you are local, consider joining the Indianapolis Moms Book Club!
Binge-watching TV.
I highly recommend picking out a new-to-you, binge-worthy show. I am watching The O.C. for the first time, and I love the nostalgia — I didn’t watch it in high school!
Keep doing the mundane mom things.
I’ll admit that I let a lot of things go when I felt depressed during the pandemic. Popsicles for breakfast? Sure, why not? Movies all day? Okay, that sounds good. I’m all for taking mental health breaks — we carry a lot on our shoulders as women and moms — but I also know that I feel better when I keep going. I don’t want to get stuck this time. Pack the kids’ lunches. Vacuum. Check homework. Wash the dishes. Read a book with my kids. I am making a difference, even if it doesn’t always feel like it.
