Steve and I have been married for 14 years. From the onset of our relationship, we knew that we were very different. He preferred nights with a Blockbuster movie while I was still very much in my party girl phase. I have always loved spending birthdays or holidays elsewhere, whereas he prefers having dinner at home with family. While Steve spent winters hibernating, I spent them on Meridian Street out with my friends. I went to brunches and had cocktails with friends, and he was content with a movie night with his Dad. While I made plans to be social, he just went with the flow. And that has worked for us. But regardless, it is obvious that I am the extrovert married to the introvert.
And then we started a family.
Fast forward seven years into our marriage, and we now have children to contend with, so the wanderlust has subsided a bit, and the fatigue has clearly set in. So now I, DeAndrea Beaven, prefer nights in with our two small kids. But as my children have gotten older, the extroverted DeAndrea is starting to come back. I spend long days during the week organizing football and cheer practices, being active in school activities, working full-time, and of course, being a mom. So I have been craving that time away from responsibilities and a night out being social. But what about Steve?
A New Year’s Eve Compromise
New Year’s Eve has always been a big holiday for me. This year, after 14 years of marriage, Steve and I have come up with a compromise. We will spend New Year’s Eve in Chicago as long as the visit isn’t overwhelming and filled with stuff to do and tons of places to go. We decided to bring my mother for extra reinforcements (aka babysitting) so that we can go out together and alone. In all honestly, I realize that New Year’s Eve is a rookie holiday. For me, there is something magical about celebrating the fact that we made it another 365 days, all while putting on a sparkly dress and fancy heels. But I also get to incorporate my family, and I love that part too. The opportunity to take our children places and show them things is always at the top of our list, and I feel blessed with the opportunity to do it.
Steve and I have mastered the art of compromise, and no book could ever teach this to us. He knows me, and I know him. Steve understands that socializing makes me feel good, and I understand that for him, being home allows him to recharge. The beauty of where we are in life is that we are who we are, and we do not begrudge the other for the fact that I am eternally extroverted and he is introverted.
The thing that we share is our children. They are looking for experiences from both of us, and as we grow as a family, we are fortunate to be able to provide them with that. They see us compromise for one another as well as for our family. And with that, I am looking forward to a New Year’s Eve with lots of love and, of course, lots of sparkle.